Ten Dope Things About Being Single

2015 © Dana Eve Valencia

Being single isn't so bad. In fact, there are lots of good things to be said for it, and every time a date turns sour I cheer myself up by enumerating the many advantages of being on one's own. 

_________________ 

TEN DOPE THINGS ABOUT BEING SINGLE 

by Dana Eve Valencia

❶ You can spend a lot of quality time with yourself.

❷ You can eat Cheetos and mashed potatoes in bed.

❸ You do not have to look and smell alluring twenty-four hours a day.

❹ You can put on weight if you wish. (In other words, you can eat all the Cheetos and mashed potatoes you want!) 

❺ You can binge-watch True Detective without being sneered at for your peculiar taste and odd obsession with sleuthing and perplexing things.

❻ You can tweet or post anything on IG and FB, minus the guilt.

❼ You can have a girls night out, ditto.

❽ You can join in on the fun when the club DJ hollers, "Single ladiiies! Make some noooise!"

❾ You can sleep diagonally.

❶⓪ You can converse uninhibitedly with your books or laptop or any household device.

See? It's actually not so bad. Can you think of some more benefits?